R.I.P. Chivalry

Who-knows-how-long-ago to January 28, 2008, Chivalry has passed away - seemingly overnight. It was survived by women everywhere, and men who will never get a clue.

I'm convinced. Chivalry is dead. I welcome a disagreement on this topic as my faith in men, or wait, BOYS, has been lost quite possibly forever.

Love notes? A thing of the past. Phone calls? Replaced with a text. Talking until 2am on the phone? G-Chat is much easier... just wait until you are arthritic at age 45, you can't type, and you'll have no idea how to interact. It's all become too easy for boys to slack off in the romance department. That's right, I said it... ROMANCE. Remember? You wait by the phone in hopes of his number appearing on the caller ID (still a recent development - I never had caller ID until college). You've been practicing what you'll say and you anxiously await his question. "Um, (nervous) I was, um, wondering if you wanted to grab dinner on Thursday night, or, um, maybe a movie or something?" So it isn't the perfect rico suave invitation... but at least it is clear, to the point, and you have a date with an actual human being on Thursday! He picks you up (yes, picks you up because he has a car), you go to a restaurant that he has selected, opening all of your doors he walks up to the maitre'd and says "chivalrous boy, reservation for 2". Your heart melts as he's taken the time to call ahead. You are ushered to your table where he pulls out your chair and you sit gracefully ready for the next round. He carefully selects a bottle of wine (after asking what you are thinking of having... this could be a bit much, but he should ask) and orders it - actually pronouncing the name correctly. You select your main course and he orders an appetizer and then your dish (if not, he lets you order first). You have stimulating conversation because he actually ASKS QUESTIONS and has more than a one word response when you too engage in the question asking portion of the evening. He'll compliment your look, then your awesomeness... and then as the evening comes to an end, he'll suggest "doing this again soon" upon opening more of your doors and then driving you home. He'll call you in the next few days and ask you for the next date... you'll happily agree because, well, why not? He didn't go over the top. It wasn't mushy or cheesey. It was simple and sweet and you felt like a lady.

I have a best friend... she has the worst luck with dating. She recently went on a date with a guy. She was so-so on the decision to go because he is young and she didn't know anything about him and he sort of resembled her ex. BUT, she accepted. They had a nice time... I'd say he did at least half of the "what you should do's" and she ended the date satisfied. Until the follow up. He sends her a TEXT. "Would you like to do something on this week?" She responds: "Yes! Sounds good." He says: "Ok, well how about YOU plan it this time."

EXCUSE ME? I thought he was the one who suggested doing something in the first place. Isn't he supposed to plan it? And via text?! I was floored, stunned and speechless. This isn't the first incident. This is the third guy in a row to ask her on a first date and then ask her to plan the second. Is this what dating in the 21st Century has come to?

So long, chivalry. It was so nice to know you... even to see you briefly.

A mourning service will be held in the very near future for our outdated friend. Also being remembered are the love note, manners, the much anticipated phone call, and the prior planner. Donations will be accepted in honor of the deceased at the Center for Women Have to Do It All... Again.